It takes all kinds

Do I have a story for you!!! This is a good one, I promise. It features a woman that we'll call Crazy Copy Machine Lady. Yes, definitely crazy.

Our story begins at the Adult reference desk, where Crazy Copy Machine Lady runs over to the copy machine. Unfortunately for her, there is already someone using it. She (loudly) asks the man how many copies he needs to make, and he tells her it's none of her business. (Well, he's got a point!)

As she speed walks back past the Adult reference desk, she YELLS at the librarian telling her that the man was RUDE to her and she NEEDS to make a copy. Luckily for CCML, there is another copy machine on the other side of the building by the Children's information desk, which is where CCML enters MY life.

CCML practically runs by my desk (not bothering to stop), where my co-worker and I are sitting.

CCML: (in a loud voice and talking so fast that we can't really understand what she's saying) COPY MACHINE! COPY MACHINE!
Real Librarian: Excuse me?
CCML: (in a voice so loud that she could be heard in the next county) I NEED THE COPY MACHINE, CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?!?!?!?!
RL: ***stares in shock*** (it's okay that I was too shocked to answer her. Turns out, she knew EXACTLY where the copy machine was.)

This is when my co-worker notices that CCML is carrying a dollar. Now, this wouldn't be a big deal, except that the copy machine in the Children's department is ANCIENT. It takes ONLY dimes and nickles, and only 10 cents at a time, so there is no way that the woman will be able to use her dollar. Rut-Roh...

The next thing you know, she goes running FULL TILT back down the hall to the other copy machine. When she passes the Adult reference desk, she screams for the whole building to hear...

COPY MACHINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yikes. Well, this is the last that we heard from her. I guess she was able to make her copy and leave.

But that's when I realized something. This CCML is the same woman who months ago told me that I was mean and miserable to people because I was a fat bitch. Yup, she called me a fat bitch - in the same loud tone (well, not the screaming tone, but the louder than normal conversation tone), and caused the 12 people on the computers in the immediate area to stare in shock and horror as she walked away.

The reason she called me a fat bitch? Because I was helping a patron on the phone when she walked up, and wouldn't drop what I was doing to help her. Even though I was standing beside another librarian at the time who was actually sitting at a computer not helping anyone and ready to assist her.

Nice, huh? I told you it was a good one!!!