May I have your attention, please

So, I'm sure we all have things that we wish we could say to people, but it's just not appropriate or we don't think of it until after the fact. Well, I've come up with a couple of things that I wish I could tell people, or maybe even announce over the library's paging system. Or maybe post them up like "rules" at the Pool or something like that...Hmm, now there's an idea!

Remember, this list is based on actual events...

1. Please try to remain in the vicinity of your child. That way, if he starts screaming "Mom!! MOM!!! MOTHER!!!!" you will be close enough to stop the screaming after the first "Mom!!"

2. Please refrain from running in the library. We are not a racetrack or a playground. If you fall and crack your head, we are not responsible.

3. The library is not a place for pornography. If you want to look at hot naked co-eds on Myspace, please do so at home.

4. We don't need to be teaching the kids that it's okay to "roar" in the library. Unless you teach them to use their "inside roar."

5. Please pick up after your children. Unless you want me to come to your house, throw all the toys and books all over the room and leave so you can pick it all up. Cuz, I will.

6. Please remember that voices carry. If you are sitting at a computer in the children's room telling your friend how you threw rocks at the neighbor's car, we can hear you. And make sure we don't know your neighbor.

If you have anything you'd like to add, please leave a comment!!! I'd love to hear what y'all come up with!!!